Thursday, April 30, 2020

You're stuck at home. Why not write a poem?


My illustration Toilet Buddies. (Just a typical day at my house)

I answered the call. Then...crickets. 

The Minneapolis Star Tribune decided to throw an anticlimactic poetry party for National Poetry Month. Earlier in April, the Star posted a call for humorous limericks related to the Coronavirus. Rhyming fun ensued. (at least for me) On April 30th, they were supposed to publish the winners. Nobody won. There were no poems. No rhymes. Nothing. I looked.

At least, I learned something:

A limerick is a short and fun five-line poem with a distinctive rhythm. The first, second and fifth lines are longer than the third and fourth lines. The rhyming pattern is AABBA. The longer A lines rhyme with each other and the shorter B lines rhyme with each other.

Maybe they'll publish the limericks on a later date. Or, maybe it was an April Fool's joke. Until then, here are my submissions:

Some folks fear a sidewalk contagion
While others tread with distracted domination
The meek always pass on the grass
The rude hold firm to their path
I hope sidewalk sharing is the new situation


>^..^<
I'm shuttered up tight with the spouse
Not a threshold's shy of the house
We quarrel from noon until six
All is fine when we tune to Netflix
Happier still lifting spirits to mouth



>^..^<
There was a cat with a notion for commotion
The racket left me wondering what it inhaled as a potion
The evidence lay outside the loo
 A roll of T.P.chewed up, but no poo
Now there's a naughty cat in need of demotion



Do you have a favorite? I bet you can guess mine. 

P.S. The Star published the poems on May 2nd. They were hilarious. The paper received 4,000 submissions. Holy cow! I didn't make the cut.