Two Tears in a Bucket

Akua in a bucket.

We're planning a trip to Savannah next Summer,  and being an aspiring writer, the first thing I did was pick up a copy of Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil. I'd never read it. Even so, I knew it would be the perfect literary guide to the city - and a great beach side page turner to bring along on our travels to Nicaragua this winter. I wasn't disappointed! Needless to say, I'm sick of Flor de Cana rum. (not really) It's Nicaragua's holy water and I can't get enough. Nevertheless, I can't wait to sip a martini in Savannah while sitting on the bench and grave marker of the poet Conrad Aiken. Meanwhile, I'll watch a few ships pass by - their destinations mysteriously unknown. I won't mind making a toast to him and his ill fated parents, but I draw the line at giving his parents a suspicion. Anyone fool hardy enough to commit murder, then suicide, doesn't deserve a sip of my tasty beverage. 

The real life characters in the book were humorous and enchanting. Especially the drag queen nicknamed the Grand Empress of Savannah. She had a motto that I found irresistible. I told my husband about it and now it has entered into our language lexicon. Especially while on vacation in Nicaragua - life is slower there. Sometimes, the gringo faces certain challenges. First world problems to be exact. It's good to have a phrase to spout when times are tough - like when happy hour isn't observed as it should be. Or, when the breakfast that is supposed to start at 7, suddenly and unpredictably, starts at 8. Can you imagine? The worst thing possible happened on a Monday. We were on a gelato streak. We got dreamy, creamy gelato - the best in the world - every darn day...until Monday rolled around. Ever have a case of the Mondays? Well, I did. They were closed!  AAARRRGGGHHH!!! But I need my medium sized, half chocolate, half passion-fruit gelato. Finally, after much frumping and grumping, I decided that it wasn't the end of the world to wait for a pina colada later that day. For heaven's sake. Of course, times really are tough for most of the country. Many people still travel by horse; most people need to collect wood just to cook or heat water. Chicken dinner...where's the ax? Need milk? Hitch up old yellow. 

When the going gets rough, just think of Chablis. Drinking wine is a well known cure for the Mondays, but I mean the drag queen from Midnight in the garden of Good and Evil...

"Mama's different though. She has a big ol' photograph of me bein' crowned Miss World, and it's hangin' in her living room. She taught me not to worry about things that don't matter. She has a motto that I love: 'Two tears in a bucket. Motherfuck it.' That's  Mamma. She's a okay girl." 

The lady Chablis and John Berendt from Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil.

Words to live by!